A sister is a gift to the heart, a friend to the spirit, a golden thread to the meaning of life. ~Isadora James
Some years ago, after my husband’s mother died, we got together with his brothers and sister to find a way to keep the family from drifting apart as can happen when each family becomes its own extended family with kids and grandkids. We understood that things do change. Families can’t always continue to get together at holidays, but we didn’t want to completely lose that family closeness that comes from being together and sharing our lives. So, we came up with the plan to have a yearly brothers and sisters retreat. My husband only has one sister, but I say sisters because we sisters-in-law claim sisterhood too.
Sisters in law by chance; friends by choice.
This picture is a selfie we sisters-in-law took when we took off on a walk down a trail through the woods. In the rain. Well, it wasn’t raining when we started. It had been, but we thought it had stopped. No, not really. But we walked through the misty rain and enjoyed the beauty of the trees. We did talk a little about what we would do if a bear came up out of the woods. My sister-in-l;aw who is youngest, just said she’d have to outrun us. And she probably could have, but luckily no bear showed up. The rain stopped, and we were all smiles in our selfie picture.
I’m not exactly sure how long know we’ve been enjoying this family retreat, but I’m guessing more than ten years now. We pick a weekend in the fall and then find a house to rent that will hold us all. For the first eight or so years we rented a house in the Smoky Mountains. That was sort of in the middle for us in Kentucky and Darrell’s sister who lived in Georgia at the time. We rented the same cabin so many years in a row that it began to feel like ours. Then after Darrell’s sister moved back to Kentucky, we started finding places closer to home and have been enjoying the Cumberland Lake area although not in the same house each time. We plan our menus. Divide up who is bringing what and then show up on the day of our trip with trucks loaded down with food. We eat well, but the best thing about fixing our own meals is how we can sit around the table and talk. Sometimes the brothers and sister share stories of when they were growing up. Sometimes we talk about their mother and father. Often those stories make us laugh even when we’ve heard them a dozen times.
Then there’s the grandparent talk as we each share about our wonderful grandkids. That’s when the phones come out to share videos and photos. We love seeing the new babies in the family. We share all the good news about whatever the kids might be doing and smile at the cute things the little ones say now or what the bigger ones used to say when they were little tots. A couple of families are having great-grandbabies to liven up their family gatherings and one family has a son who just married. So they are looking forward to new grandchildren showing up in the next few years.
We even like hearing about the new four-legged family members. My niece and her husband joined us this year and it was fun hearing Randy talk about his new bloodhound pup that is over a hundred pounds and still growing. I wish I had a copy of the picture he showed me of him relaxing on his couch with that dog on his lap. And of course, I get to talk about my dog buddies too.
We hang out, we help one another, we tell one another our worst fears and biggest secrets, and then just like real sisters, we listen and don’t judge.– Adriana Trigiani
Always before we leave, we take some pictures. It’s sometimes a challenge to get everybody in the picture with nobody there to take a picture for us. But there are timers on those cameras. So we propped the phone in a window and snapped this picture of us all. I should have looked at it closer and asked my brother-in-law move out from behind the tree, but you can still see his smile.
The smiles are the best. And the family talk. And sharing our lives.
Do you have special people in your life that you make time to see? Are those family connections important for you?
Comments 8
I think the siblings & in-law retreat is wonderful. Time away from chores and other responsibilities allow all to relax and connect. Keep it going and one day, hopefully, the cousins will begin having their own retreat.
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That could be, Jean, but all our kids are spread out pretty widely. Maybe at least each individual family group of siblings will find ways to stay close. We do look forward to several days together catching up on family and having a good time.
So happy that you all continue to see each other once a year. Our family did a Cousin’s reunion until the host in Houston, MS was stricken with pancreatic cancer and was gone from us in less than three months. None of us picked up the baton. There aren’t a lot of us left! 😢 You have a lovely family!
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A cousin reunion is such fun. We used to do that before Mom got sick and subsequently passed away. She was the last of her sisters and I don’t think we had any reunions after her last sister died. By then Mom was having memory problems and the reunion would have been hard on her. I’m so sorry about your cousin’s pancreatic cancer. That’s what Dad died from. In about three months from diagnosis too. It’s a hard one. So take care, Karen.
And thank you. Darrell does have a great family and I’ve been part of them so long that they are my family too now.
I love how you have sibling and spouse retreats! I participated last spring in a cousins’ retreat in the mountains of North Carolina. My sister and her husband and two cousins, both from our father’s side of the family, met there and spent a few days together. We took with us photos of our families and mutual relatives, shared stories about various ones, ate meals together, did some sightseeing (Carl Sandburg’s home), hiked, shopped in the quaint shops in town, rested, etc. We spent a delightful few days together and made some great memories!
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I like the fun of adding cousins too, Suzanne. We had some cousins who were very close to us when we were kids that we don’t see that often these days.
We used to have an annual reunion, but that went by the wayside when Mom got sick several years ago. Maybe we can start it up again.
Sounds as though you had a great time with your family. So fun.
My sister and I started taking trips together for a week every year. After our dad and sister died Mother went with us, until she had a stroke and could not travel. Mother died several years ago and my sister and I still take our yearly trip, just to get away and have our special time together and remember when all the family was still together. We are very close even though 10 years separates us. We give thanks to God for allowing us to have these special times together.
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As the quotes I posted and more that I read say, Joy, sisters make the best friends. I have two sisters who are definitely also best friends. 🙂 And I consider my sisters-in-law friends too. We have such good times when we get together.
I know you enjoy your yearly trip with your sister.