Kids Explain Why God Made Moms

Since I’m busy trying to meet a deadline for my work in progress and with Along a Storied Trail releasing last week, things have been busy. Along with that, I had a granddaughter celebrating a birthday last week, another granddaughter graduating high school in a neighboring state, and a different granddaughter visiting for a marathon game of Monopoly. I did an interview recently that asked what was my kryptonite for my writing, and I had to say it was grandkids. They grow up so quickly that I want to share their special times while I can. So after Wednesday slipped by last night without a post, I pulled out a rerun from a post I did in 2008. Sometimes I’m amazed at how long I’ve been blogging and how many posts I’ve done – way over a thousand.

But I think you’ll enjoy this one again. It makes me think of the old Art Linkletter show, “Kids Say the Darnedest Things.” So here are a few kids saying the darnedest things about “Why God Made Moms.” These are supposed to be 2nd graders, but sometimes I wonder about things I get as pass-alongs on the e-mail circuit. But we’ll just assume this is real and not somebody’s imagination working overtime and just pretending to be seven-year-olds talking.

Why did God make mothers?
1. She’s the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2. Mostly to clean the house.
3. To help us out of there when we were born.

How did God make mothers?
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us. (I think this is my favorite.)
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.

What ingredients are mothers made of?
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
2. They had to get their start from men’s bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.

Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
1. We’re related.
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people’s moms like me.

What kind of little girl was your mom?
1. My Mom has always been my Mom and none of that other stuff.
2. I don’t know because I wasn’t there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
3. They say she used to be nice.

What did Mom need to know about dad before she married him?
1. His last name. (Another of my favorites. That last name is important.)
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?

What does your Mom do in her spare time?
1. Mothers don’t do spare time. (Too true.)
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.

What would it take to make your mom perfect?
1. On the inside she’s already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I’d diet, maybe blue.

If you could change one thing about your Mom, what would it be?
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I’d get rid of that.
2. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.

Hope these made you smile.

What were some of your favorites?